About this episode
Why is the "most wonderful time of the year" also the time, all too often, when our kids are at their worst?
Drawing on research from child psychologists, developmental experts, and real-life family dynamics, Amy and Margaret explore this extremely familiar dynamic, and explain how disrupted routines, sensory overload, anxiety, social expectations, and good old-fashioned exhaustion collide to push kids past their emotional thresholds.
They discuss:
How blown-up routines remove a key emotional “protective factor” for kids
Why holiday excitement + uncertainty creates anxiety (for kids and adults)
The “migraine threshold” analogy for understanding meltdowns
How neurodivergent kids experience holiday environments differently
Why expectations—ours and theirs—fuel disappointment
When misbehavior is emotional dysregulation vs. strategic escape
How to rethink traditions so they actually work for the kids you have
Practical ways to add back small routines, reduce overwhelm, and prepare kids ahead of time
If holiday gatherings feel harder than they “should,” this episode offers compassion, insight, and doable strategies to help every kid (and parent) get through the season with less stress.
Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode:
Selman, S. B., & Dilworth-Bart, J. E. (2024). “Routines and child development: A systematic review.” Journal of Family Theory & Review
Amhefferan for In the Now Counseling blog: Why Do Kids Misbehave On Holidays?
Howcast: How to Handle Your Child’s Holiday Stress with Dr. Robin Goodman
Melinda Wenner Moyer on Substack: Why Do my Kids Turn Into Monsters Over the Holidays?
Melinda Wenner Moyer for Slate: Better Not Pout, Better Not Cry
Melinda Wenner Moyer on Substack: Managing the Post-Holiday "Why Are My Kids Acting Like This?" Slump
Megan Devine for Empowering Parents: How t
