About this episode
Evangelical shame, a sexless marriage, and kinky polyamory—Axe shares how discovering chastity, power exchange, and explicit consent helped him finally feel at home in his desire.? PARTNERS | Make your world a sexier place—get a discount & support the pod!ÜBERLUBE: the BEST personal lubricantLORALS: FDA-cleared latex lingerie | Use the code LOVER for 10% offFIRMTECH: Performance-enhancing cock rings | Use the code LOVER for 15% offSHAMELESS CARE: Sex positive healthcare | Use the code LOVER for $15 offMOTORBUNNY: Sex machines & riding toysENJOX TOYS: Enjoy smart sex for everyoneSDC: A place for swingers to connect? STATS | 31 straight cis male, switch, librarian, from the US south, into: kink, polyamory, masculinity, connection? TIME CODE00:00 His sexless four-year marriage04:06 Condoms, safer sex, and learning how his body responds07:11 Growing up with abstinence-only education and evangelical guilt10:10 Discovering porn, masturbation, and early anal play15:04 Turning off desire in Christian college and finding religion again on his own terms19:12 Marriage without chemistry, erectile struggles, and medical answers22:42 Why explicit verbal consent is necessary for his arousal27:17 Losing his virginity at 30 and his first grateful, joyful hookup30:18 Serial dating, “shoulds”, and realizing why monogamy didn’t work for him33:00 Wanting kids, exploring mid-century masculinity, and reimagining family through polyamory35:25 Building a kinky, poly book collection at the public library37:23 Poly saturation, multiple partners, and finding balance39:17 Sexless marriage support groups and why everyone deserves great sex42:32 Restraints, ball gags, collars, and exploring dominance44:08 Chastity cages, control, and denial fantasies49:07 Strap-ons, anal play, and loving power exchange52:19 Threesomes, group sex fears, and learning how to receive pleasure58:32 His hopes for a futu
